Here it goes

This is my first official post to my first blog. [crickets chirping] I feel like the dancing frog on Bugs Bunny. He dances and sings but when the curtain is pulled and the lights are up he just sits there. So here I am......... sitting. Trying to think of something witty, inspirational or entertaining. But the truth is, I'm just not feeling any of those things right now. Because right now I'm just sad. And to make things worse I'm having some guilt issues. Don't worry, I didn't put ex-lax in the brownies for the work potluck or put a flaming bag of dog poop on someone's door step. But now that I think of it, I did put an opened jar of pickled herring in someones car......during the summer.......Ok so that made me giggle a little! Anyway, No, it's not that. Someone I love dearly is not in the best of health. He is barely hanging on. I haven't seen him in years. I don't call, I don't write and I can't remember the last time I sent him a father's day card to tell him that he was the closest thing to a father I ever knew and that I learned so much from him. There are so many lessons in life to be learned. And when you have an amazing teacher it makes it all so much easier.





He probably wouldn't see himself as a teacher. But I beg to differ. He gave me the best parenting advice. See, I started having kids at a young age. I had never been a big fan of kids and didn't plan on EVER having any.Yet, there I was, 19, pregnant and completely clueless! He told me that the most important thing to remember about parenting is to be consistent and always be prepared to follow through with your threats! Don't threaten to do things that you simply can't do! I use that philosophy every single day. And let me tell you, it's words to live by. He taught me the art of sarcasm and that the delivery of a backhanded compliment can be a beautiful thing. I don't have one bad memory of him and that's probably why I can't bring myself to see him right now. I want to remember him the way I last saw him because the truth is, I'm a weak person. I break down in the middle of Target reading greeting cards. So, I want to carry the good memories with me. That seems a little selfish to me sometimes. I'm not normally a selfish person. This is a hard thing for me to cope with. I hope he can forgive me. I hope you can bear with my while I laugh through the pain some way or another. I need a time out.