Overcome.

I have finished writing a book. It is a book that I started years ago. Not the first book I ever started  writing but one of the first ones. I'm pages away from finishing revisions and suddenly I can't look at it. I feel panicky. If that's even a word. I keep thinking "what if people don't like it".

This takes me back to the beginning, when I decided that I was going to be serious about writing, not just posting to this blog but actually putting a story together into book form. Not my story, that would be way too much dysfunction for one book. Originally, I got serious because it was something I loved to do, write, and I wanted to do something that made me happy. I wanted to follow a dream and all that mattered was finishing a book, maybe publishing through amazon as an ebook. I wanted to entertain people. In a way, I wasn't doing it for anybody but myself and entered into this with the "It doesn't matter what other people think" attitude. But then I have nights like tonight when I panic and think "OH NO! I'm putting myself out there and it feels funny"...................And I doubt myself.

It's a curse.

Someday, I will come to terms with the fact that I can't achieve it if I don't go after it. If I don't take chances...........That's failure.

I have overcome many things, my insecurities are not one of them. It's time to flourish, right? So, now I go back to work and get these six pages out of the way and send it off to the few people that have been supportive of this craziness. And by the way, if you're reading this...........Thank you in advance.